Communication Part 2

With all the technology available today, you can't replace human contact. It keeps us real.

When you just can't get together in person, emails are quick, fun and sometimes the only time you have to let someone know you're thinking about them. Letters are better - more personal - however in this day and age of go-go-go who takes the time to sit and write? Cards work too but again the time to go to the store, pick it out, sign it, maybe even write something then address it is too much for many people.

But the phone. Hearing someone's voice is priceless. You can be 2500 miles apart, but hearing that person's voice brings you together. Close your eyes and you can see the person to whom you're talking. With cell phones it's even easier to find time to call people (yes, I admit, I have a headset and hands free dialing for the express purpose of calling people while on the road).

I just got off the phone with one of my closest friends in the world. Since 1993 we've only seen each other 3 times however we stay close by phone calls. Seeing his number on my missed calls (a plus for phone technology) made my day. I called him back and we talked for a while. Caught up on things. He recently lost his father and while yes, I'll send a card, being able to verbally express sympathy means so much more. I could hear the pride in his voice when he talks about his little girl. We can both hear the caring in our voices for each other.

Ah, yes. The phone. Next best thing to being there.

Relaxing in NYC

Sitting in NYC at Yaffa’s enjoying a beer with a friend. The weather is beautiful, the company enjoyable and the environment fun to watch. Yaffa’s is at the corner of Greenwich & Harrison. This area is known as Tribeca to those who know their way around town. (That was my something new learned that day). Many of the buildings here are old and have wonderful architecture inside and out. We sat outside and watched the world around us. People watching is fun in NYC. We saw celebrity look alikes and amazing outfits.
At the next table was a group of women doing the same. As the evening progressed we realized these women knew everyone! Their group was in constant flux as someone would leave, another would join, etc. Everyone who joined was greeted with enthusiastic hellos! True neighborhood bar. That is the way to spend an evening :)
At our table my friend and I caught up on our lives. We hadn't seen each other for 5 years though we keep in touch by phone and email. Being able to sit, have a few beers and just talk made my week. I feel blessed to have friends like him in my life.

NYC - Chinatown

Walking in NYC is the way to go. Especially when your friend's kids want brand name purses. Of course these purses normally cost over $100 - at least. In NYC however you can find street vendors selling the knock offs for $15-20 so we headed to Chinatown on advice of co-workers. We get there and no street vendors however there are those who will lead you to their wares. They stand on the corner: "Purses? You want purses?" then they lead the unsuspecting tourist to make a purchase. The first person to do this made us a bit nervous as the stairwell she wanted us to follow her to didn't look too promising! The second one didn't look as threatening so my friend went up while I waited on the street. Her theory - our cell phones worked and she had hers ready to call me with one touch. Her efforts paid off as she found not only purses for her kids, but one for herself too! Her mistake was telling her mom and she had to repeat the adventure another night :)
We went back to Chinatown to find a place to eat the next night. Finding the restaurant wasn't as adventurous as the purse search however we did get to see the Chinatown markets - definitely an interesting set up! The restaurant was found and food delicious though the service was SLOW. My friend and I decided it was us it seemed everywhere we ate during the week had really slow service JUST for our table. Go figure.....

42 - Ground Zero at night

42 - Ground Zero at night
Originally uploaded by islandbum.

Ground Zero

Today - July 10, 2005 - I arrived in NYC for business. My office is next to Ground Zero.

Today I visited Ground Zero for the first time since that fateful day. Now rebuilding it is still a powerful place. I stood outside my office and remembered. Just stood and remembered…

• Coming through NYC on the way to the Grateful Dead show, playing tourist and going to the top of the WTC Towers
• On that same trip taking the ferry ride to see the NYC skyline
• My first business trip, staying at the Millennium Hilton and walking around the WTC because I didn’t know there was a walkway connecting the hotels to the WTC and into the World Financial Center
• Stopping and standing looking straight up at the Towers amazed at the height
• Finally finding the walkway and enjoying not going out in the rain around the building
• Window shopping in the underground mall and getting good pizza on another business trip
• My friend loaning me his subway pass, taking me to the WTC station and showing me what train to take to get to Brooklyn
• Standing in my office building admiring the WTC Towers
• Standing in my living room and watching the Towers fall
• Wondering if everyone I knew was safe on 9/11
• Praying for the those who were not and their families and friends

Powerful place filled with emotion.

Friends

A friend once wrote: The most love you can give to someone is to be there for them. The hurt you feel shows how much love you gave. He's a very wise friend. This statement is true for all types of relationships. Many people see the word "love" and think it just applies to romantic relationships. Nope, sorry, not that easy. Friendship can be just as painful sometimes.
In my opinion, hurt within a friendship is the most painful. I don't use "friend" too loosely. If I call someone a friend, it means something. I've connected with that person in some way. Now, there are levels of friendship -- I have some friends who I will never lose touch with and some who are here and now (or there and then) only. If something is going on within the friendship and signals are crossed, it causes hurt. Yes, sometimes that hurt is all in one or the other's head. The closer the friend, the harder it is to ask what's going on to clear things up. OK, so that has something to do with conflict management, that's a whole different topic. Admit it - no one likes conflict - especially if in their mind it's worse than reality. Getting past the worse case sceanario in your head is the hardest step.
I've lost friends along the way. It would be nice to say it's all their fault, however, it takes two to have a friendship and it takes two to lose it. I'm not a stupid person. I know these things and have learned much over the years. So why the hell do I write blogs instead of talking to people?! Oh, that's right, conflict .....well, there are 4 categories of conflict management..........

Where thoughts lead

What if all the world could see your every thought? Would you be proud of those thoughts, or would you be embarrassed and ashamed?
In fact, the world can see your thoughts. For your thoughts do surely and eventually make themselves known in the way your life progresses.
If you carry around hateful, angry, cynical and destructive thoughts, those thoughts will infect your life with misfortune, disappointment and emptiness. When most of your thoughts are thankful, loving, creative and joyful, those thoughts will be expressed through your life as success, achievement, and good fortune.
In each moment, you are able to choose your thoughts. And as those moments build on each other, the thoughts you have chosen become clearly apparent in the details of your life.
Your thoughts are yours to create, control and direct. By increasing the positive value of your thoughts, you bring real, positive substance into your world.
Choose thoughts that you'd be pleased for all the world to see. And those thoughts will lead to a life that is impressive indeed.
-- Ralph Marston